2012 Last Quarter’s Reflection

I have been wanting to write, be it in my personal diary or even on this online platform that allows me to think fast and type.. (i meant that  my thoughts flow freely whenever i am in a state of constant writing) and a random note, sometimes when i read beautiful stories, i have the urge to write my own story too. this post is going to be long, and i know one day when i look back at it, i might smile to myself for whatever reason/reflection i have at that point in the future.

maybe i do not have that courage yet, to get started. and as i am granted a little more time these days to think and exercise introspection, i have to admit my lack of courage despite always presenting myself as confident.. and anyways i have come to acknowledge and affirm the important things in my life. family, people i’ve met and my surrounding environment.

i read an interview by this famous person (perhaps by now i can claim myself to be a stalker/fan of sorts of celebrities/well known individuals) and reading interviews by others opens up a new world which i may learnt from or even derive reflection from. okay.. so this person said that looking back at her whole 29 years of life, the only people who are constantly in her life are her family members. and for that she finds them important, of course coupled with the fact that they have given her unconditional love and support. having grow up quite a bit this year, i could find the same thing on myself; where family is always there to render support or simply just the notion of being there without fail.

on the the people i’ve met; of course we meet many people throughout our life and will continue to do so, because it is impossible to be in total isolation even if you enjoy solitude.. they say no man is an island right? personally i can be judgmental or sometimes skeptical about people/things around me. sometimes i am quick to form an impression then it will dispel after how the person behaves (good/bad)..

my point is because i form these impression i would develop thoughts about my own conduct, the person’s conduct and also how i see things. in that sense i feel that people around me is important, i can ignore them but inevitably they shape my perception on things and even provide me with inspiration or even serve as my mentors. i won’t touch on my surroundings, but doing Geography has allowed me to be more appreciative of my surrounding environment more, and of course along with the people i’ve met they are not mutually exclusive, i mean  they complement 😉

and recently i read a book titled “Nothing to Envy” by Barabara Demick; it’s a story written through interviewing defectors from North Korea.. while i question the 100% credibility i have come to appreciate reading things beyond the nice, happy endings, and it somehow made me reflect too~

some thoughts i’ve formed after reading the book, the human spirit is remarkable. true that we might have created invention that harm the Earth or that we are complicated beings, something i find comforting from reading the book is how the North Koreans depicted in the story are strong.

they might have been deceived, they might be starving, but most of them never say no to survival.  even for those who eventually die, not once did they do things that worsen their predicament. they have acted certain way (bow down to their regime?) simply to ensure their own survival. even if it meant convincing themselves that what they have is good, i see it as the need to carry on living and maintaining an unbroken spirit under that dampening atmosphere. they sought for ways to alleviate their situation even if the result does not make much difference, but it is simply a matter of “better than”.. of course i can only imagine how things truly are given the circumstances but the way they act, they have demonstrate a survival instinct~

a thought came to me last night, actually it’s more like affirming my belief:
appearance may change for the better or for the worse, but what is inside us remains and radiates from within. may we never change for the worse.

christmas is two days away, and i guess i am happy to have written a post even if it’s not that much a reflection. happy holidays to anyone reading and maybe the new year be a smooth and happy one =)


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